Assisted suicide media love fest continues even as body count increases

Five assisted suicides in Washington State thus far. And counting.

Tragically, we can expect the body count to continue. That’s because pro-suicide advocates have ramped up their PR campaign to normalize assisted suicide as just another ‘end of life care choice’ and sell the lethal practice to an ever growing number of vulnerable ill people and families through subterfuge, clever media marketing, and raw exploitation of end of life fears. Gone is the limited number of carefully selected ‘white wealthy men with above average control needs ’ policy we saw in Oregon. Now, it’s a full-press ‘everybody and their mother needs assisted suicide;’ and ‘it’s the best thing since sliced bread’ kind of engagement, complete with tailored human interest news stories and misinformation about pain control, natural death, and real end of life dignity.

In the last few weeks alone, local, national, and international media have picked up (or been offered) several stories sympathetically featuring victims and family members and sugar-coating the ugly reality of assisted suicide.

Just last week I was interviewed by KOMO TV in Seattle, who was doing a feature on Linda Fleming’s family’s response to her assisted suicide. (Linda Fleming, a disabled and low-income woman with pancreatic cancer, was Washington’s first assisted suicide victim. See previous blog entry.) The segment, which aired on local TV news, featured many tragic minutes of Linda Fleming’s daughter speaking about what a good thing her mother’s assisted suicide was, still more time interviewing the doctors who assisted in her suicide and also thought it was a good thing, a statement from Rob Miller from Compassion and Choices speaking still more positive words on Linda’s unnatural death by unnatural means, and several old photos of Linda and her daughter, accompanied by a moving musical soundtrack, totaling, for the TV segment, perhaps 10 minutes (for the internet version of say six minutes).

And, then, as a stark reminder of continuing media imbalance on the issue, about 30 seconds were extracted from a 45 minute interview of me discussing the adverse effects of the media attention glorifying Flemings death by assisted suicide and how the wrong message is being sent to vulnerable ill people and their families, causing many to believe they ‘should’ commit assisted suicide. Hmm. Let’s see. Four people in favor, plus a moving photo tribute, and some really nice music. Opposed? One voice. Less than a minute. And a few truncated quotes.

In another media story, KING TV in Seattle is following a man by the name of Tory Plaisance, who wants to sign up and receive a lethal overdose under Washington’s so-called Death with Dignity Act. Just one unexpected problem turned up in the glowing feature: Tory Plaisance isn’t actually terminally ill after all (at least right now). Turns out that perhaps Tory used to qualify for the Act but doesn’t any longer. Apparently a recent CT scan shows his tumor decreased and his condition improving. Tory’s situation showcases one of the law’s major problems: the unreliability of terminal diagnoses for determining who qualifies to receive a lethal prescription. According to KING 5, “his plans” (for a death by assisted suicide) “have been complicated by a recent positive diagnosis.” Tory’s response to this news: “That’s just how I’m kind of torn right now, like ‘Yay I could live’ and ‘Damn I could live.”

Let’s review this: even with all the nifty-stricty safeguards in the Act, Tory could’ve already received and taken a lethal drug overdose, in which case he’d be way dead—without even being terminally ill. And yet he’s alive, working five days a week, watching his softball team, taking care of his cat, and living life, albeit with serious illness and some limitations.

Tory’s tragic story—one in which the good news of not being terminally ill is described as a complication impeding his wish to receive assisted suicide—should alert us the horrific abuses involved marketing assisted suicide as the only ‘peaceful’ death alternative to people who are ill, vulnerable, and alone. People who are ill experience depression and discouragement at times. As do the rest of us. Life, after all, is not easy or without struggles. Ambivalence, fear, and loneliness are also a part of life—including the lives of people who are ill and their caregivers—which is exactly why people who are ill and their loved ones are so vulnerable to the exploitation and subtle coercion of this lethal new law and to the media marketing campaign surrounding it’s use.

Glorifying death by intentional barbiturate overdose while setting up natural death as the ‘straw man’ of horror and agony is as manipulative as it is just plain wrong. And Washingtonians—and people everywhere deserve ‘the rest of the story.’ But we aren’t getting it—not in the least.

What else aren’t we seeing in the media?

Well, there sure aren’t a plethora of features on ill people and their families who are choosing natural death, news crews ‘following’ those who choose not to participate in assisted suicide or those who give or receive excellent end of life care and community and hospice support. Nor are they interviewing poor and disabled people who feel they have ever fewer care options aside from assisted suicide, especially with Washington State’s draconian cuts to basic health care and caregiving assistance. They are not interviewing those unfortunate ill persons who feel they might be a burden to their families and thus should ‘get out of the way’ via a sacrificial suicide or those who may be coerced by people who’d rather they die than live. In short, the real story of assisted suicide in Washington State and elsewhere has yet to be told.

And people continue to die as a result.

The legalization of assisted suicide is both a tragedy and a travesty, not only for Linda Fleming and Tory Plaisance, but for all those in Washington State and elsewhere who are, or who will be, victimized by the marketing of assisted suicide as compassion and choice, rather than what it really is, exploitation and coercion. I feel abiding sorrow that Linda Fleming was a victim of this merciless and lethal  law.  And I offer my condolences and sincere regret for all those in Washington, Oregon, and elsewhere who have thus far died unnaturally, prematurely, and unnecessarily by assisted suicide violence masquerading as choice.

Don’t ask/Don’t tell who’s committing assisted suicide

From Bellingham, Washington:  Don’t ask/Don’t tell which doctors are committing assisted suicide.

Hmm.  Let’s see if we have this straight… 

 Whatcom County Medical Society President David Lynch said at a recent panel held at the Bellingham Club,  “It’s a question of don’t ask, don’t tell,”apparently a reference to physicians assisting suicides under Washington State’s new so-called Death with Dignity Act.  According to Lynch, the Whatcom County Medical Society has asked opposing physicians– those who will continue to provide excellence in end of life care but will not help their patients kill themselves — to identify themselves on a list. “Many have done that,” he said.  But at the same time, the Medical Society is intentionally not keeping a list of those willing to prescribe lethal barbiturate overdoses.   

One wonders: in this brave new world of legalized assisted suicide, are some doctors more equal than others?   Strange as it may seem, the Whatcom County Medical Association asks physicians who advocate caring for their patients, rather than killing them, to be listed publically. Yet those MD’s who are actually committing assisted suicide will continue to overdose patients under a veil of medical and state- sanctioned secrecy. 

And how about patients?  Do some deserve clear information and above-board reporting with regard to physician care practices, while others are kept in the dark, unaware and uninformed that a trusted family physician is prescribing lethal medications to loved ones rather than compassionate and competent end of life care?   

Besides, why the shroud of secrecy? If providing lethal barbiturate overdoses is such a groovy new (albeit lethal) medical service, what’s there to be ashamed of?  If, as Compassion and Choices spokesperson Arlene Hinkley said, the new law is “a fact of life and we have to live with it,” then why can’t patients and family members in Whatcom County and elsewhere know which physicians, facilities, and providers do and don’t participate in assisted suicide, which ones are compatible or incompatible with their own philosophies of care?  (I can’t help but issue a distorted language alert at the preceeding vernacular:  The new law isn’t ‘a fact of life’, but rather a direct cause of death.  And the whole problem is that we can’t live with it–it’s killing us.)  

After all, most of Whatcom County knows that Peace Health and St Josephs Hospital are improving and enhancing end of life care, building a new hospice center, and opting out of involvement with assisted suicide. In other words, according to Nancy Stiger, former cancer nurse and St Josephs CEO, the hospital is “living our mission, which is relieving pain and suffering.” Amen to that. 

Certainly it’s well and good—even essential—for patients and families to know which doctors, hospitals, and facilities they can trust with their lives.  True Compassion Advocates, and all those who oppose assisted suicide and advocate for improved end of life care, strongly favor making such information available and accessible everywhere.  But it’s also important for people to be able to freely choose not to go to a provider who commits assisted suicide on vulnerable ill people. 

I mean, it’s all about choice, isn’t it?  At least that’s how the slick I-1000 bill of goods sold last November was marketed.  Suicide proponents trumpeted enhanced choices and marketed assisted suicide as a valid health care choice,  all the while whipping up voters into a end of life fear frenzy.  (Twisted language alert:  this ‘health care choice’ is more than a little weird–it’s designed soley to ensure a prematurely and unnaturally dead patient. And there still aren’t any safeguards ensuring that it’s actually the patient and not someone else making the lethal choice.)  Now it looks like suicide promoters don’t even want people be able to choose an assisted suicide free physician to provide their medical care.  

‘Choice, choice, and more choice’ seems to have morphed into: not my choice, not your choice, not our choice.  Turns out the so-called ‘choice’ of assisted suicide is nothing but a rent-a-wreck careening down a dark and slippery slope, detouring into a Dead End.        

Washington’s 2nd assisted suicide

Wednesday, June 3rd: The second death in Washington by assisted suicide—and this time we have no details. Was the person low-income and disabled like Linda Fleming, the first person killed under the new law? We may never know. The secrecy that shrouds Washington’s so-called Death with Dignity law means that the public has no access to information about who is having his or her life terminated prematurely and why.

This week’s news headlines included extensive front page coverage about 36,000 Washingtonians being cut from the health rolls and about funding being slashed for the care of disabled persons. Into this context comes the secretive announcement about the second Washington State-sanctioned death by lethal drugs. Was the second unfortunate victim of this lethal law also in danger of having funds cut for life-saving health care? An ill person whose caregiving funding was slashed? A middle class family in tough economic times who needed access to competent care, not lethal drugs? We may never know.

Another innocent victim of poor information and even less access to quality end of life care has died this week of assisted suicide. The tragedy continues…

Washington State’s first assisted suicide death: a day of sorrow and tradgedy

Washington State’s first assisted suicide death:  sorrow and tragedy

Thursday, May 21^st was a day of sorrow and tragedy, a day in which Washington State logged its first victim of assisted suicide and lost one of its most ardent and eloquent foes.   Ironically, Linda Fleming died of assisted suicide the same day as anti-assisted suicide hero, John Peyton died naturally of ALS.  It is a tale of two people, dying the same day in profoundly different ways, with radically different understandings of dignity at the end of life.  True Compassion Advocates offers our heartfelt sympathy and condolences to both families. 

The differences between the two deaths are vast, the similarities few.  Both had terminal diagnoses, both endured pain, but each took a very different path and verbalized a very different perspective at the end of their lives.   

Ms. Fleming, who was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer a little more than a month ago, died of assisted suicide via a lethal drug overdose in the first such recorded death since Washingtonians passed the fatal law in November of 2008.  She apparently left a note stating: “I am a very spiritual person, and it was very important to me to be conscious, clear-minded and alert at the time of my death.  The powerful pain medications were making it difficult to maintain the state of mind I wanted to have at my death.”

According to the New York Times report dated 5/23/09, Ms. Fleming was divorced and filed for bankruptcy in 2007. The Times quoted her lawyer, Hugh Haffner, as saying Ms. Fleming “had been unable to work because of a disability and lived in subsidized housing on $643 in monthly disability checks.”

Just days before his death, Mr. Peyton, who suffered from ALS, expressed continued concern about the legalization of assisted suicide in Washington, stating he ‘felt It victimized people with terminal illnesses and exploited their fears.”  Speaking clearly and with passion, even as his life and breath waned, John Peyton expressed solidarity with all those experiencing life-limiting illnesses and stated his “worry that people with disabilities, those in tough financial circumstances and without adequate caregiving support would feel pressure to take a lethal drug overdoses.”  Ms. Fleming’s untimely and premature death gives witness to Mr. Peyton’s concern for the disabled and the poor being at particular risk for assisted suicide.

The extensive media coverage surrounding Ms. Fleming’s death by assisted suicide sent the wrong message to people with life-limiting illness and their families—the message that assisted suicide, rather than good medical care and improved community support, is the solution to end-stage illness or disability. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Talk of uncontrolled pain without any adequate information about the ready availability of good pain control fans the flames of fear existing within ill people and their families. It’s difficult enough to have a terminal illness without a social, cultural, or meida environment which negates hope of competant and compassionate care.  In fact, a large percent of people who die of cancer, including pancreatic cancer have never experienced any pain and do not require pain medications at all.  And those who do have pain, like Ms. Fleming, can have that pain controlled well, be comfortable, and still be able to interact with familiy and friends, be cared for lovingly, and prepare spiritually.  For many years, even Yet the take home message is one of: “perhaps I need to take a lethal drug overdose—maybe there is no care available.”  This message was abhorrent to John Peyton and is offensive to anyone who has an expertise in hospice or palliative care or anyone who has cared well for a dying loved one.

As a caregiver to two close family members who died naturally and comfortably from pancreatic cancer and hospice nurse to many people with pancreatic or other cancers, I am deeply  concerned that vulnerable ill people’s fears not be exploited by media or by assisted suicide proponents.  Excellent comfort care, pain control, symptom management, and support are available through hospice and palliative care.  We just need to get the word out and improve access and payment for good end of life care.  John Peyton was right: assisted suicide is exactly the wrong answer. 

Assisted suicide is a tragedy which heightens fear and increases misinformation about living and dying.  We need to advocate for truly compassionate care, not false and misleading choices.   

RIP John Peyton, assisted suicide foe, hero, and friend…

I can’t remember the first time I met John Peyton, but it must have been nearly 20 years ago, through our mutual work in opposition to assisted suicide and in advocacy of those at risk.  I was impressed then, and have been ever thus, with John’s erudite words, logical mind, and compassionate heart.  John and I had run in to each other many times over the years with delight, ever advocating for our terminally ill and disabled fellows.

So it was with a heavy heart that I received a call from John a little more than a year ago telling me he feared his recent difficulty walking was the prelude to the devastating ascending paralysis disease of ALS.  Several doctor visits and only a few weeks later, that sad reality was confirmed.  John, in his typical Boeing computer programmer fashion, was understated and factual. Vintage John, he was more worried about how his dear wife Patricia and his beloved daughters would cope than he was about his own impending paralysis with Lou Gehrig’s Disease.

Over the last year, as John became progressively more physically debilitated, his always transcendent spirit became ever more translucent.  In the fall, during the campaign against Initiative 1000, John spoke with his trademark passion (though without his customary breath), to anyone who would listen, including many national and local media outlets, about the delight and joy he found in living with real dignity and true courage during the final months of his life.

On Fox news, John’s profound honesty and life-giving compassion brought the host to tears.  John had that effect on many of us—inspired as we were to be in the presence of an honest-to-goodness hero of the first magnitude.  John’s wife Patricia and I ‘let our eyes sweat’ copiously on more than one occasion after watching John, who could not move his arms or legs and who needed total assistance with even the most personal of tasks, speak of how he was much happier and more at peace with ALS, completely dependent on the care of his loved ones, than he had been in his entire adventure-filled life.  It was a paradoxical truth—but one he could wax and wane on until, literally, his breath gave out.

John knew what far too many ill people do not know—that in allowing his loved ones the gift of being able to care for him, he was giving them the forever-gift of increasing their loving compassion and allowing them to live their love for him in concretely particular actions.  He knew this would help them weather their grief at his loss as well as face  their own deaths when the time comes, as surely it will for all of us.  John knew, too, what many do not: that he wasn’t a sum of his functional working parts, not a human doing, but a human being with unconditional worth and inimitable dignity—none of which was dependant on what he could or could not do physically.

As recently as a week ago last Saturday, when I had the honor and the privilege of spending several hours with John and his lovely wife Patricia, John murmured again his thanks and appreciation for the gift of his entire life—but especially the last, ALS-filled part.  He spoke with a soft smile of his love for his bride Patricia, of the first day he met her as a college student, and his wondering then about ‘how it would be to live alongside such purpose and beauty.’ Well, he found out, and he loved every minute of it.  His daughters, their spouses, and grandchildren meant the world to him.  And he regaled me and so many others, with humorous yet eye-sweat-inducing accounts of the little ones ministering to him so lovingly.  To Patricia and all the Peytons: we thank you for sharing him with us.  It has indeed been an honor and a privilege.  You have our condolences and our prayers.

His friends—and there are a world of us–will miss him every day.  We will remember his smile, his words, and his lived compassion in the midst of the trials of a debilitating illness.  Mostly, advocates of true compassion everywhere will be inspired by John Peyton’s commitment to protecting the vulnerable ill and his leadership in opposition to the deadly faux choice of assisted suicide.

Rest in peace John.  Thank you and God bless.

True grit + lived compassion = caregiving

Are you a caregiver? Have you ever been one?

If so, you’ll know all too well the unique combination of exhaustion and self-transcendent love involved in caring for an ill spouse, parent, or friend. In the last few days, I’ve been inspired anew by the selfless courage, lived commitment, and true caregiving grit evidenced by three extraordinarily women I know. These women, in very different caregiving circumstances, are walking the talk of lived compassion. They, and so many other unsung heroes like them, are choosing live daily for the good beyond themselves and to embody care for the vulnerable ill.

In the midst of this death-denying/disposable/assisted suicide legalizing society of ours, care such as theirs is notable and salutary. And, thank heavens, it is not rare—though one would not know it to read the newspapers.

The job description of caregiver as ‘the best, most heart-wrenching, yet achingly necessary job you’ll ever do’ seems to fit the bill—yet doesn’t even begin to describe the honor and the privilege, the frustration and the gut ache, the constant worry and the all-too-common sleep deprivation, that, among other things, typifies the experience of lived caregiving love. And that’s when the person one is caring for is beloved and appreciative. The other sort of caregiving, which involves caring for someone (perhaps a relative, perhaps a friend), who, shall we say, is appreciation-challenged and behaving abominably. That sort of caregiving is the grit-your-teeth-and-choose-to-live-love-no-matter-what kind of caregiving. And it is, if possible, even more challenging. And exhausting. And even more heroic.

No matter the sort, any kind of caregiving really must be accompanied by a healthy measure of societal, community, and familial support. And yet, all too often, it is not.

True Compassion Advocates is committed to building community-based support for caregivers and to connecting caregivers in need of help with the information, resources, and assist they need to ease at least some of the burdens of caregiving. Our caregiver resource section is a good start, but in the weeks and months ahead we’ll be adding to, updating, and improving that as well. In the meantime, www.youragingparents.com has wonderful practical caregiving tips and know-how, along with a wealth of supportive information. It really is one of my favorite sites. Check out topics for great checklists and immensely helpful articles. (Some of the articles are written specifically for Catholic audiences—but all are applicable to general audiences as well. ) And a fairly new organization in California, Loving Back, also has an on line support community in addition to extremely helpful information. Check it out.

Truly, my hat is off to my dear friend caring for her beloved spouse as he lives out his final days and weeks, my wonderful friend for providing loving care in tough circumstances to her father, and my new friend who cared so faithfully for her husband as he died and is now going the extra mile for her very ill childhood friend. To each of these, and so many more who advocate for true compassion with their lives, I say thank you. To those of us who can pitch in and help ease the burden (the burden, of course, is the situation, not the ill person), I say: ‘Let’s have at it!”

Today is a good day to start. Call that friend, family member, or neighbor right now. Offer dinner, a ride, respite, help. Walk the talk. Help a hero. Become a compassion advocate.

Swine flu and assisted suicide?!? Turns out there’s a connection…

Swine flu and assisted suicide connected?  Bizarre.  Yet true.  But only in Washington…

Here’s the deal: Today’s Seattle Times features a prominent article on the front of the B section entitled: Swine flu role verified in death: officials reaffirm report after family denies it. State says man with H1N1 died of pneumonia.  It turns out “that the Snohomish County resident with swine flu who died Wednesday definitely had the virus, and it played a role in the ailing man’s death.”  The story goes on to report : “the unnamed man’s relatives had told KOMOTV that they don’t believe he had swine flu at all—and that he died of underlying heart problems instead. His death is the first to be linked to swine flu in Washington and the third in the United States.  The other two fatalities also involved people with serious underlying health issues. ”

Hold the press!  Let’s review this, shall we?  So, it turns out that the unfortunate gentleman from Snohomish county and the other two who have died in the US with swine flu had swine flu and serious underlying health issues.  But medical and health officials report that all three died of swine flu—or at least that swine flu played a prominent role in their deaths.

Hmmm.  Can’t help but wonder what the death certificates will report?  Do you think the death certificates will be accurate?  Should they be?  Will they actually accurately report what these people actually died from—which was swine flu?  Or just report that they only died of the underlying diseases?  And leave the swine flu virus, which was the proximal cause of each death, out of the form completely?

Does it matter?

Look, it matters a heck of a lot.  Obviously.  And not just for swine flu deaths.  We must be able to keep track of who dies of what, when, where, and how.  Data obtained from a tabulation of death certificates helps us spot trends in morbidity and mortality and ascertain causes of death by county, state, and country.  Such information is vital to the health and welfare of the rest of us—researchers use such information as tools to track trends and recognize patterns, to establish public health guidelines or social policy changes, to protect vulnerable populations and to spot and prevent discrimination, among other things.  In other words, we keep track of the vital statistics on death certificates to save lives. 

Everywhere in the US, it has always been a requirement that death certificates accurately reflect reality—reflect what actually happened to cause the person to die, not just what a physician feels like putting down as the cause of death, what the family wishes were the cause of death, or what the state orders a physician to put down as the cause of death.

Everywhere that is, except in Washington State, in the brave new world of ‘truth is way stranger than fiction.’  Here, ever since the so-called Death with Dignity Initiative passed last November, physicians are now required to falsify death certificates when patients die of assisted suicide.  Truly, as strange, irrational, and illogical as it might appear, when a Washingtonian dies of an intentional lethal drug overdose, his or her physician is REQUIRED to lie—to say he or she died only of some underlying disease instead.  Assisted sucide is not even mentioned as a contributory factor.

So, to paraphrase George Orwell, it would seem that some Washington death certificates are more equal than others. Those with swine flu, for instance, are required to be accurate and complete. Yet with assisted suicides, death certificates MUST be obfuscated and falsified.

One wonders: if accuracy of death certificates is a matter of life and death for swine flu, why is it not for assisted suicide?

Incentivizing Assisted Suicide Through Financial Coercion

And now for something completely different: Incentivizing Assisted Suicide Through Financial Coercion. You heard it here first.  But you shouldn’t have.  Shoulda been headline news everywhere.  For months, if not years.  But nope. Nary a word.

What DID make the front page of the Seattle Times today was a big article draped across the front page about something intricately connected—but sadly without any obvious ‘connect the dots’ rejoinders. Today’s Times notes: ‘Sharp increase in welfare cases: 32% more in state apply for financial assistance—officials see more middle class families as downturn takes its toll.’

Hmm. Let’s review this: 32% more families need public assistance this year, many of them formerly middle class before a job loss, health issue, foreclosure, or other tough luck situation landed them in rough financial straits.  And they’re not alone…not by a long shot. In the last few months, Washington State has radically chopped health care access for thousands of sick, elderly, and disabled people—and ditched a chunk of assistance to homebound seniors as well.

Let’s see. What ELSE has happened of note in Washington State in the last few months?  Ah, yes.  Assisted Suicide.

It just so happens Washington State has legalized giving lethal drug overdoses to vulnerable poor and middle class people in the middle of the greatest economic crises since the great depression—and smack dab in the middle of chopping, slashing, dicing and slicing any real health care or social support choices other than assisted suicide. Hmmm.  But don’t worry. Those aren’t connected.  Not-at-all.  There aren’t any financially coercive elements to the ‘free choice’ of assisted suicide.  Nope. (And if you believe that, I have a Wa Mu mortgage for you.  In Florida.  And some GM stock.  Along with some Enron wallpaper I’ve been saving.)

The truth is, this isn’t the first time the brave new world of assisted-suicide-for–lack-of-any–other-valid-choice has reared its ugly head—and it won’t be the last time either. It’s been happening for years in Oregon, masked by some handy dandy rigged statistics brought to you by—you guessed it—the very people who market, package and deliver assisted suicide to a state or country near you.  In Oregon, when they whacked off ‘health care for the poor’ for thousands, economically marginalized Oregonians like Barbara Wagner were offered state assistance for an assisted suicide but no payment for routine cancer chemotherapy.  And tragically, many more low income and middle class seniors, devalued by their fellow Oregonians, abandoned by the state, and sold a pro-suicide bill of goods, ended up killing themselves in record numbers, thereby shaming Oregon with one of the highest senior suicide rates in the country.

And now it’s Washington’s turn, more’s the shame.  Unless.  Unless each one of us sits up, takes notice, and decides to say, ‘No way: Not on our watch.’

These people at risk, the poor AND the middle class across the state and across the world, need our help, assistance, and support.  The 32% more who need Temporary Assistance for Needy Families and the thousands who’ve had health care access, disability assistance, and senior support slashed are our neighbors and our friends; they are the seniors in the nursing homes down the street and the people who share the schools with our children.  Some are ill—or have family members who are ill.  Many are depressed, worried about being a burden, afraid of inadequate health care, abandoned by the state.  These people, and so many more, are at risk for the slickly marketed faux choice of assisted suicide. 

Let’s let them know they do matter—and we do care.  Let’s show them, not only with our words, but with our actions.  Please, join us at True Compassion Advocates: help us lead the way in advocating for true compassion, not false choices.  Together, we can save lives.  And live compassion.

Is Twitter for Twits? Or Heroes? Is it a vital virtual community or an ugly self-reflecting mirror? Or a hybrid?

Twitter: I’ve joined. We’ve joined. True Compassion Advocates can now be reached in the wierdee world of twitter. Or the connected world of online community. You pick. My Space is next, heaven help us.

I am, happily and hopelessly, a lover of books and children. I don’t even watch much TV. (OK, except the Mariners, and only when they aren’t embarrassing. Yep, it’s been awhile. But hope springs eternal, and who knows? Maybe, just maybe, there’ll be a harmonic convergence with Ichiro and Ken Griffey Jr. Maybe even a blue moon. Or a pink flamingo? But I digress. Again.) My world, between family, work, and community is plumb full. And then some. So why in the world even bother with ‘social networking?’ I’m caught between ‘yuck’ and and ‘perhaps it’s a positive. Perhaps this can be used for good—maybe even for saving lives.’ Perhaps not. I’m just not sure yet.

Thus far the ‘yucks’ have it, though hopefully not permanently.

I’m wondering–what is Twitter, really? Is it worth it? Can one really save lives and influence people through social networking? Or are we constructing just another virtual community so we can avoid our obligations to actual community—to those at home and at work, in our neighborhoods and faith communities who need our particular help, the compassion in action that only we can offer, the hope and solidarity that will make all the difference in the world?

At first glance, to the untechnologically saavy, it might seem like a bizarre notion: cultivating virtual friends while possibly ignoring or sidelining real ones. Is social networking a kind of virtual voyeurism to join the likes of ‘reality TV?’ Or is it the advancing of an exciting new frontier, connecting us together in innovative ways, ways which can impact more people for the better? Or maybe a little bit of both?

Help me out here, anyone: do you think Twitter and MySpace serve any actual net-positive effect in the world, or are we all so busy with friends-but-not-really and followers-but-not-really, that our elders, the disabled, and the seriously ill are pushed into substandard health care and nudged toward assisted suicide and all the while, we’re twittering as Rome–and/or Washington and Oregon– are burning. (Question: Would Nero have loved Twitter? Socrates? Churchill? How about Mother Teresa?) I just don’t see it, at least right now. But I might, with time and more acquaintence with this new, very different kind of community.

Read more »

Needless suffering drives market for assisted suicide

Q: My mother and father both passed away in the past eight months.
Each had terminal illnesses, and each died in the hospital under
excruciating, painful circumstances despite being on hospice care.
While I was mostly pleased with the hospice program, the final days
were nothing less than barbaric. My father had to be tethered to the
bed; my mother could not breathe, causing her also to be tethered to
the bed to keep her from pulling out her IV lines. Each had a living
will stating that neither wanted life support if they were terminally
ill, but they got it anyway. After they died, their contorted faces
showed the agony each suffered. Neither had eaten for days, so they
were fed despite their living wills.

While I certainly know the difference between the two situations, when
my 14-year-old family dog got to the point he could no longer walk or
eat, I took him to the vet, who put him down in a fast, humane manner
without our pet suffering. Why are we so barbaric with terminally ill
family members while beloved pets get the easy way out?

The above question and origninal blog authors answers, can be found at:
Next Steps: Debate continues over end-of-life rights, By Jan Warner and Jan Collins
Tuesday, April 14, 2009 (http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/09104/962562-51.stm)

First, I would like to offer the questioner my sincere condolences at the tragic loss of her parents. The death of one’s parents in such a way is devestating.

In addition to sorrow at her loss and heart-felt condolences, the story of parents dying so uncomfortabley evokes in the rest of us the unspoken fears lurking within each of us—the unnamed fears dwelling in the dark center of the debate surrounding assisted suicide, the fears that radical suicide proponents exploit at every turn to pass initiatives, influence judges, and promote lethal legislation.

Far too many of us are well on our way to swallowing hook, line, and sinker, the well-marketed ‘kill me quick’ product promoted by radical suicide enthusiasts, having come to believe that the only way to prevent an ignominious death is to choke down a passel of lethal pills—to hurry quick and beat the grim reaper before he beats us.

So what creates the market for assisted suicide?
Why do people want to have the option of lethal drug overdoses?

All too often, the reason the ‘market’ for assisted suicide is successful is because of poorly provided end of life care and people who suffer needlessly.  All the rational opposing arguments in the world are utterly ineffective if people considering assisted suicide are afraid of dying in the way this woman’s parents did.  If true, the sad story above is a series of unlikely and unfortunate events, which could, perhaps should, have been handled much, much differently.

So, let’s take a look: As with most circumstances, ‘the devil is in the details.’ Read more »